We live in enormously divisive times.

We live in enormously polarized times. From politics to race, religion, gender, and class, division runs rampant. In 2020, 40 percent of each political party said that supporters of the opposing party were “downright evil.” In 2019, hate crimes reached a ten-year high in the United States. One in five Americans suffers from chronic loneliness. How did we become so alienated? Why is our sense of belonging so undermined? What if there were a set of science-backed techniques for navigating modern social life that could help us overcome our differences, create empathy, and forge lasting connections even across divides?  What if there were a useful set of takeaways for managers and educators of all stripes to create connection even during challenging times?

In Belonging: The Science of Creating Connection and Bridging Divides, Stanford University professor Geoffrey L. Cohen applies his and others’ groundbreaking research to the myriad problems of communal existence and offers concrete solutions for improving daily life at work, in school, in our homes, and in our communities. We all feel a deep need to belong, but most of us don’t fully appreciate that need in others. Often inadvertently, we behave in ways that threaten others’ sense of belonging. Yet small acts that establish connection, brief activities such as reflecting on our core values, and a suite of practices that Cohen defines as “situation-crafting” have been shown to lessen political polarization, improve motivation and performance in school and work, combat racism in our communities, enhance health and well-being, and unleash the potential in ourselves and in our relationships. Belonging is essential for managers, educators, parents, administrators, caregivers, and everyone who wants those around them to thrive.

"One of 7 finalists in Season 19 of the Next Big Idea Club"

”Book of the Year Selection Behavioral Scientist and Greater Good Society”

  • "This book is a beacon of hope for our fractured times. A leading expert on belonging offers an engaging analysis of the science and practice of breaking down the barriers between people and building bridges to a more respectful world."

    ― Adam Grant, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Think Again

  • "This book shines piercing illumination on one of today’s most timely topics―the causes and consequences of belonging to modern social groups. Importantly, it maps scientifically grounded routes to minimizing the harmful consequences while optimizing the positive ones. The world needs this book."

    ― Robert B. Cialdini, PhD, author of Influence and Pre-Suasion

  • "Belonging is a masterpiece of social psychology―well-researched, highly engaging, and fundamentally useful to anyone who wants to bring out the best in themselves and in others, whether at school, at home, or in the workplace. At a time of so much social disruption and disconnection, Geoffrey L. Cohen has provided a very helpful and profoundly hopeful guide, rooted in well-tested psychological principles, that we urgently need. Everyone should read this book!"

    ― Beverly Daniel Tatum, author of Why Are All the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria? and Other Conversations About Race

  • "No one before Geoffrey L. Cohen has pulled together all the research relevant to diversity and inclusion in a single volume, helping us to understand belonging through a social psychological lens. The book is masterful, showcasing highly effective interventions. An inspiration!"

    ― Peter Salovey, president of Yale University

  • "Belonging combines rich science, compelling stories, and beautiful prose to illuminate the social psychological principles behind the need to belong and how to foster belonging and connection in a fractured world. Reading this book will yield insights into your own motivation and behavior and will help you understand the source of many pressing problems of our time."

    ― Sonja Lyubomirsky, author of The How of Happiness

  • "An exhilarating book, filled with actionable insights about making the world around you better."

    ― Dacher Keltner, author of The Power Paradox

  • "An intriguing investigation of our need to belong and how to make that process easier for the bashful among us . . . Cohen offers a learned tour of experimental and social psychology, connecting science to real life in meaningful ways . . . Cohen is to the point and unsentimental even as he points the way to a nicer way to live. A well-written, inviting treatise to be a better person."

    - Kirkus Reviews

  • “This is perhaps the richest book on belonging you’ll ever read.… The inspiration one draws from every page of this book is an enhanced sense of what is possible. It revives the very thing we need most in these times: hope.”

    ― Claude M. Steele, author of Whistling Vivaldi

  • "Cohen alternates between telling the deep history of successful social psychological interventions and focusing on modern interventions that are being used to astounding effect...If we want more people to have the chance to maximize their abilities and their contributions to society, reading Belonging is the right place to start."

    ― Matthew Lieberman, Science Magazine

 You can purchase Belonging at the following retailers:

 

Topics in BELONGING:

  • Why a sense of belonging is vital to human flourishing, and how we each have the power to nurture it even in the smallest corners of social life

  • How we can use “wise” insights and interventions in our everyday lives to make the world a better place

  • Why social psychology is the science of human potential and more essential than ever during these divisive times we live in

  • The problems that arise when people lack a sense of belonging—diminished performance at school and work, poorer health, increased levels of hostility, and more divisive politics

  • The concrete steps we can all take to foster belonging in areas such as work, health, politics, the justice system, and everyday social life

Facts from BELONGING:

  • A 10-minute writing activity that had middle school students reflect on their core values reduced the racial achievement gap in school grades by 30% and increased the number of ethnic minority students who later went on to college by 14% points.

  • An activity that had 1st year college students, or newly hired employees at a major tech firm, read stories about how feeling uncertain about one’s belonging is normal and short-lived reduced the number of students who dropped out from school and increased the morale of female employees.

  • A 10-minute conversation that established connection across the political divide softened the attitudes of political partisans and opened them up to lasting attitude change on controversial topics ranging from transgender rights to immigration.

  • A simple change in how Democrats and Republicans were led to express their opinions—as subjective opinions (“I think…”) rather than statements of fact—led their opponents to be more interested in learning about their position and less hateful in their views of each other.

  • When health care providers talked to homeless patients in a way that established a connection—asking them about their lives and taking an interest in their answers—the patients were more satisfied with their health care and less likely to need costly follow-up treatment.

  • Virtually no social-emotional learning programs conducted in schools have much of any benefit, despite their price tag and labor-intensiveness. On the other hand, science-backed activities that give students a growth mindset for understanding their peers as “works in progress” rather than “fixed products” improve their relations with peers, reduce disciplinary infractions, and lower physiological stress.

  • Most anti-bullying programs in schools don’t work, but simple, low-cost, science-backed interventions do, such as creating student groups that seed new peer norms throughout schools.

  • A 1-sentence note from teachers to their students—in which the teacher expressed a belief in students’ ability to reach a higher standard—increased the number of black students who enrolled in college 5 years later by 30%.

  • While most anti-bias training doesn’t reduce bias, small science-backed strategies have dramatic effects on reducing the impact of bias in hiring and promotion: Asking decision personnel to monitor and explain any racial imbalances in promotion—or having them pre-commit to their hiring criteria before reviewing the applications of new hires—has been found to lessen and in some cases even eliminate discrimination based on gender and race.

  • A 1-hour module that helped parole officers establish positive relationships with their parolees reduced the number of parolees who committed another crime.

  • A simple note inquiring into the wellbeing of patients who had been hospitalized for a suicide attempt reduced the number of times patients reattempted suicide.